Today I am 36 years old.
A year ago, I was suffering through one of the worst depressions of my life. My plans for NaNoWriMo collapsed at the start. I gave up my violin lessons shortly after.
Since then, I have been back in therapy. I’m on several new medications. I’ve started writing in earnest, even if it’s just in the bits and pieces of five minutes a day. I’ve taken up casual photography. I exercise more.
I’ve worked at building up more friendships. I try to be more open with where I am in life. I try to be more open about doing different things, or at least doing things a little differently.
Things aren’t perfect. There are still plenty of bumpy patches, stretches of depression and anxiety, and a few things I wish I could change but can’t.
Some people do resolutions around the new year. For me, my birthday has always been the time of contemplation and change. Sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. As I look forward to another year, I am filled with the usual mix of fear and hope.
Thank you to the people who’ve helped me along the way. Thank you to the new friends and the old friends. Thank you to the people who’ve pulled me along when I’m dragging. Thank you to the people who kept waiting outside the door when I had locked it shut.
I’m not sure where life will go from here. But at least I can say this year has been a good one.